Game Over
by Aislinn Carter
Summary: Endgame raised a lot of unanswered questions. I'm attempting to get it right in a much more traumatic and interesting way than we were showed, and with a much more satisfying ending. Basic concept of Endgame, with my own little twists and turns.
1. Chapter 1

My attempt to get endgame right. Let me know if I should continue this attempt.

My main idea from this story came from this absolutely hysterical Endgame critique I read a while back...I saw it at this web site http:// www. endgame/ index. php3 without spaces, obviously. The site is called Science Fiction Central, I believe. So the initial idea for this is credited to Richard Whettestone, for the many questions he raised in his very witty review of Endgame. If you haven't read this, you should. I was laughing hysterically.

This is basically a little revamp of Endgame...I think it's safe to say that many, many Voyager fans were dissatisfied with the series finale and found it highly implausible within the scope of the show. I certainly did. I hated almost everything about it...in fact, I think the only parts of it I liked were Miral being born and the crew getting home. So I decided to re-do it, keeping the basic concept of Janeway going back in time, but making her reasons for doing so far more tragic. Or, at least tragic enough for her to even contemplate doing so. I think we can all agree that the KJ we know and love would't have gone back in time so cavalierly just because her crew suffered a little. If she wanted to nip suffering in the bud, she could have gone back and decimated the Jem'hadar before they had a chance to start a rumble with Earth. I found her to be very out of character in the finale...in fact, I found very several characters to be behaving against their norms. Idk, maybe it's just me.

In any case, here I have my little version of Endgame. It's going to be a chapter by chapter, so I hope you like it.

* * *

It was a dull party. A dull, depressing party, lacking any of the spark in the parties Tom Paris used to throw. It was sparsely attended, mostly because there were so few left to attend. They called it a reunion…ten years. Ten years since they had returned home, to a home they didn't know and which didn't know them. Reunion. What a joke. It was a wake if she had ever seen one. 

Admiral Kathryn Janeway watched the party from her little corner of the room. She sipped champagne as her former crew drifted past her, talking amongst themselves, some stopping to say hello and exchange a few words. They respected her, she knew, but they didn't know her. It was debatable if they ever had, but they had at least felt freer with her once, a long time ago. But time in the Delta Quadrant had stretched on, shorter than physically and scientifically possible, yet infinitely longer than they had hoped. It had made a stranger out of the captain, and it had made something just short of psych patients out of the crew. They had tried to make lives when they returned to the Alpha Quadrant, and some had. But the lives they had when they were younger, the lives that had been cruelly snatched from them, were lost to most of them forever.

Kathryn watched as little Sabrina Wildman, one of the very few good things to come out of the Delta Quadrant, ran around her apartment. She was a beautiful child, with her father's dark hair and her mother's bright eyes. She smiled wanly as she saw her talking to Harry. Harry looked enthralled. He loved children, but he'd never had any. Not many of them had.

Of course, not many of them had come home, either.

Looking around the room, she saw only two or three dozen lucky survivors of the ship they had once called home. All those years, all those sacrifices…it was enough to make her physically sick. She only saw three children, out of the ten that she knew of who had been born to Voyager's crew in the last thirty-three years. Thirty-three years…and all for what?

She might have felt better about it if people seemed happy, but no one really did. They seemed content, as though they had for the most part accepted the hand they were dealt and lived life how they could. Returning home hadn't been easy for any of them, and it seemed sometimes as though they would never truly fit in here.

Maybe if they had come home sooner…

She lifted her eyes to see B'Elanna making her way over. Her former chief engineer was completely gray, like herself, and they both had the same reasons for keeping it that way: they had earned it. They had earned every single gray hair, and every hair told a story. To cover it up would be to dishonor the memory of the story, and those who might have been lost for it. They were proud of their gray hair.

"Admiral," B'Elanna sat down next to Kathryn and followed her former Captain's eyes. "She's getting big,"

"We all grow up sometime," Kathryn said softly. "She is so like her mother."

B'Elanna let out a delicate snort. "More like her father if you ask me, with all those logical twenty questions she asks," she said affectionately.

"No. She has Naomi's wide eyed innocence. All the questions, the desire to learn, the tagging along. It's like looking at Naomi all over again." Kathryn's eyes cast down again. "Pity she couldn't remain innocent for very long."

B'Elanna put a hand on Kathryn's arm. "Hey, you did all you could. No one could ask for more. We all went through a lot out there."

"Yes…But we really didn't have to, did we?"

"Come on, Kathryn. We were a family, throughout everything. Despite everything, even." They both smiled. "You can't change the past so there's no point in thinking about it."

Kathryn stiffened momentarily as she continued to stare at Sabrina. Then she stood up and moved to the bar. She picked up another glass of champagne and took a sip. B'Elanna moved to stand next to her.

"I suppose you want to know."

"I do."

"The high council had a lot of questions."

Kathryn gazed at her. "What did you tell them?"

"The truth." Then she smiled. "With a Klingon twist. I told them my beloved former captain, who had saved my life many times in glorious battle, would be honored to submit Korath's house for consideration."

Janeway laughed a little. "Do you think it will work?"

B'Elanna shrugged a little. "I'm just the Federation liaison, but I'd like to think I have some influence." She narrowed her eyes and scrutinized Kathryn. "You still haven't told me why you're trying to help Korath."

"He's an old friend."

"Don't give me that crap, Kathryn," B'Elanna said softly. "I want to know what this is about, and I want to know what it has to do with the mission you sent my daughter on."

Kathryn stared at her old friend. She knew that once, B'Elanna wouldn't have dared speak to her that way. But they had shared too much, been through too much. "I can't level with you B'Elanna," she said. "But I can tell you that I hope it will all work out. And I'm sorry Miral couldn't be here. She wanted to come, but she knows her duty." Kathryn placed a hand on her friend's arm. "I've taken enough family from you," she said sadly. "I shouldn't have this time, but Miral will be home soon. Don't worry."

B'Elanna smiled sadly and patted Kathryn's hand. They turned when they heard a glass being tapped.

"May I have everyone's attention, please!" Reg Barclay had his glass raised. "Ten years ago tonight, this crew returned home from the longest away mission in Starfleet's history. Twenty three years together made you a family, one I'm proud to have been adopted by, so let's raise our glasses…to the journey."

"To the journey," those assembled murmured.

Kathryn's heart clenched as she raised her own glass. "And to those who aren't here to celebrate it with us."

* * *

Reg had wanted her to help him teach a class on the Borg. "Come on, Admiral. With my experiences on the Enterprise, and your intimate knowledge of the Collective, every cadet at the academy will want to take this class." 

Kathryn sighed. "Reg, I'm going to be honest with you here. I hate the Borg. I hate every last one of them, from old Borg to new Borg to…to former Borg. Except for Icheb, of course. Other than him, I hate them all. I don't want to have to stand up for a semester talking about them, thank you very much."

Reg looked confused. "But…you were very close with Seven of Nine. I thought…"

"I'd prefer not to discuss Seven of Nine." Kathryn said coldly. Reg had just nodded, at a loss, and turned to leave.

"Reg," she called. He stopped and turned around. "Don't forget, I have other things to take care of. I can't afford to be distracted right now."

He nodded slowly. "I understand, Admiral."

"And, Reg?"

"Yes?"

She leveled an unblinking, penetrating gaze at him. "Don't forget…about what you promised me."

He hesitated, then nodded. He left.

She was even more relieved now that she had decided not to teach the class. The semester had just started, and she already had to leave. And where she was going was worth more than any class.

Plus…she really did hate the Borg.

* * *

Miral had contacted her, and her news had been encouraging. "Judging from the scans Korath has permitted to me to take, I would have to say that it will work. I mean, there's no way to know for certain, short of using it, but all my readings indicate it will do what is promised. The only thing I should warn you against…it only works once. Well, actually, the spatial transporter will operate more than once, on a short range basis, but likely only a time or two more. This device will burn out rather quickly. I would think you would want to reconsider. It won't do for you to be stranded so far away." 

"So Korath has agreed to the exchange?" Kathryn asked eagerly, ignoring Miral's concerns.

Miral blinked in surprise, then looked down. "Yes…."

Kathryn's mouth tightened. "But?"

"He's insisting on handing it over to you personally."

Kathryn smiled. 'I'll be there as soon as I can. Good work, Ensign Paris."

* * *

"Are you sure about this?" 

Kathryn smiled wryly at Reg. "Am I ever really sure about anything?"

He grinned. "Well, you do a good job of appearing to be."

She laughed softly and gestured to the couch. "Have a seat."

Reg made himself comfortable as he began to go through the case he brought. He glanced around the apartment. "You cleaned up pretty well from the other night."

"Well, there wasn't much of a mess," she said. "I would tolerate a mess if only I had a loud, boisterous former crew packed in here."

"I understand."

Kathryn watched as Reg sifted through his things. "How's married life?"

"Wonderful," he lifted his head and waggled his eyebrows at her. "You should try it."

"Oh, I think it's a little late for that. Marriage is for the young…like your wife." She said slyly.

"I can only hope she ages as gracefully as you have," Reg stopped searching through his belongings to look up at her. "Admiral," he said softly. "If it's not too late for an old fool like me to find someone to share my life with, it's certainly not too late for you."

Kathryn smiled. She thought of Reg and his wife, a thirty-five year old Borg specialist he had met a year ago while doing research for his planned class, just after she rejected his offer to teach the class with him, right about the time he had started helping her with her own little project. _They're so happy together,_ she thought. _Do I have any right to risk that?_

Kathryn gave herself a mental shake. The decision had been made, the ball was rolling. Reg approved of what she was doing. They'd had this discussion before. _The universe has a way of working itself out,_ he had told her. _If Nancy and I are meant to be, we'll find our way to each other, no matter what you do to the timeline._

"I think that's a part of why I'm doing this, Reg," she said sadly. "To make sure it's not too late for me."

Reg gave her a brief smile and turned back to his case. "Oh! Here it is," he said, pulling a hypospray out. He handed it to her. "Once you inject the Chronexaline, you'll have about forty-eight hours of protection from tachyon radiation."

She turned the hypo over in her hand, staring at the opaque casing. "I understand."

He handed her a dark PADD. "I downloaded everything onto this before I left. This should be everything you need."

"The shuttle?"

"Waiting for you at the Oakland shipyard." He sighed. "I wish you'd let me come with you. Or even Harry or B'Elanna."

"Sorry Reg, but this is my mission." She flashed him an impish smile. "Besides, if you leave, there won't be anyone to teach those eager young cadets about the big, bad Borg. And most importantly, no one to teach your eager young wife…other things."

Reg flushed. "She's n-not that y-y-young."

Kathryn laughed. "You're stammering, Reg. I haven't heard you do that in years."

He gave her a weak glare, before snapping his fingers and pulling a thermos out of his case. "Oh," He stood up and handed it to her. "I made you some fresh tea for the trip. Not that replicated stuff."

Kathryn took the mug, her eyes pricking with tears. She embraced Reg, hugging him tightly. "Thank you, for everything." She pulled back and squeezed his hands. "I wouldn't have been able to do this without you."

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, don't remind me." He smiled softly at her. "Good-luck, Kathryn. I hope…I hope you change the world."

* * *

"Any final words of advice for your old Captain? Wait, don't tell me. I'm being impulsive, I haven't considered all the consequences, it's too risky." Kathryn smiled and leaned down to brush the leaves off of the simple plaque in the ground. She ran her fingers softly over the raised letters. "Thanks for the input, but I've got to do what I think is right." A lone tear dripped its way down her weathered cheek. "I know it wasn't easy, living all these years after what she did, Chakotay. But when I'm through, things might be better, for all of us. Trust me." She swallowed hard. "Even though, I know there was a time when you didn't. But I know you figured out that I was only trying to protect you. If this goes right, you won't need protecting." 

Kathryn stood up, angrily wiping the tear off her face. "Good-bye, my love. Wish me luck."

* * *

Now here she was, standing in a cave that had obviously seen better days. She wrinkled her nose. B'Elanna and Miral were such clean, organized, efficient women. Why couldn't the rest of the Klingons take from their example and get an apartment instead of a cave? How they made it to outer space was beyond her understanding. 

Everything was in place. She had the Chronexaline Reg had smuggled out for her, and she had her shuttle all ready for the trip. All that remained was getting her hands on the little jewel she had sent Miral for.

Miral came strutting out of one of the tunnels, smirking. "Welcome to the house of Korath, Admiral."

"I love what he's done with the place," Kathryn said sarcastically.

One of the guards angrily started spouting Klingon. Miral immediately turned and retaliated. The guard backed off. Miral took Kathryn's arm and moved ahead.

"What was that about?"

"He said your demeanor was disrespectful."

"I hope you told him I didn't mean to be rude."

"I told him if he didn't show you more respect, I would break his arm."

Kathryn chuckled. "You are your mother's daughter."

Miral smiled. "Korath is waiting. We should go in."

Kathryn stopped her with a hand on her arm. "Sorry, but this is where we part ways."

Miral looked at her in shock. "Excuse me?"

"You're dismissed, Ensign."

"But Admiral, I really think that-"

"I can take care of myself." Kathryn said firmly.

"With all due respect, I've been working on this for six months, and-"

"And it's over." Kathryn narrowed her eyes. "Understood?"

Miral was seething. "Yes, ma'am." She said through clenched teeth.

Kathryn sighed. "Look, we both know why I'm doing this. If it goes right, you won't even remember any of this. You will have had a different life, a happy one, I hope. So go see your mother. She's very anxious to see you. Take a few days leave, and just be with her. You're all she has."

The fire left Miral's eyes, and she swallowed. "Yes, ma'am." She said softly. She turned to leave, then faced Kathryn again. "I want you to know that I appreciate what you're doing…what you're willing to do to make it better." She hesitated. "To bring my father back."

Kathryn touched the young girl's cheek. "I wish you could remember him," she said softly. "He loved you so much." Then her mouth set in a straight line and she stood taller. "But once I'm done, I'm sure you'll have a lifetime of memories with him. Just believe in that, Miral. I'll do my best to bring your father home. Trust me."

Miral smiled. "I do." She nodded, then left Kathryn alone.

* * *

The 'exchange' with Korath had gone the way she expected. He tried to break his end of the bargain, so she'd had to break his face. After she neutralized his guards, of course. A well hidden projector weapon tucked inside her sleeve had taken care of that. Once, she might have resorted to a more diplomatic approach, but the time for diplomacy was well past. She had lost patience with everything, with life, and she would be damned if she'd let some pompous Klingon ruin her plans. 

Not that it mattered. When she was done, things would have change. She and Korath would likely never meet. At least, she hoped her counterpart would never meet him. He was exceedingly unpleasant.

She thought about her counterpart as she cruised along in her shuttle. She had been very young, that Captain Janeway, even if she hadn't known it. She had been innocent, untainted by the crushing despair of her life. Because even though she had been stuck in the Delta Quadrant for seven years, she had no idea what real despair was. But she would. It all began that year, and it only got worse.

Kathryn had toyed with the idea of when to go back to for a long time. At first, she contemplated just going back to the beginning, back to when the Caretaker had taken them. She had tried to figure out how she could fix it, how she could save the Ocampa and send Voyager home. But was it worth it to send them home? Chances were that most of them would die anyway. Chakotay's crew certainly would, if they didn't end up in prison first. And with the Dominion War right around the corner, Kathryn had serious doubts that many of them would have made it out alive, especially with Voyager being such a ship of the line as she were. Captain had no doubt they would have been sent right into the heart of the action, and they may not have made it out.

Well, then when? The Ferengi wormhole? Suspiria? She could even go back to when they built the quantum slipstream drive and fix it for them. There was a whole new class of ships today with slipstream drives, and she knew within another decade they would have completely replaced traditional warp cores. If she went back with the new specs, Voyager could be home after only four years in the Delta Quadrant, instead of 23. But the slipstream drive had been created out of a collaboration between the engineer and…Seven. Well, she could always go back to the first time they met her during the conflict between the Borg and Species 8472, and maybe somehow get Voyager home. And make sure Seven didn't come with them. She shuddered over that one. She had half a mind to go back and blow Seven out of the airlock herself.

When she really thought about it, despite some horrible, tragic situations, the first seven years had been the best years of her life. The crew had bonded; they had become a family. They had explored things that no other Federation citizen would get to experience in this lifetime, and they had become more than what they had started out as.

But as the seven years passed, things got more strained. She had felt herself moving away form the crew, burying Kathryn until the Captain was all who was left. She very rarely went to crew functions by then, and she almost never had time alone with Chakotay, who was supposed to be her best friend., She heard about the crew's activities and milestones through him, and she mostly kept to herself.

The incident where they lost Joe was what really sent her over the edge. It had been so ironic, really, that their first mission from Starfleet after all those years had resulted in Joe's death. Joe, who had been a 'fleeter through and through. After that, she never really saw Starfleet in the same light again. The way she saw it now, the only thing they were good for was destroying lives, and the only reason she had stayed was to have this opportunity.

They had been fortunate that their losses weren't more severe over the years, but they lost people the same as any other ship would, and after a while the losses became few and far between. But when Joe Carey died, so senselessly…it had really been too much. Everyone went downhill from there.

So that was it, then. It had taken a lot of work and thought and calculation, but she finally decided she was going to go back to the incident with Friendship One. The Borg transwarp hub wasn't that far from there, and she could save Joe. In fact, she could ensure that no one from Voyager ever set foot on that planet. They could fix it without actually having to go down there. They could beam the probe up. No one would have to die.

Then, she would lead them to the hub.

It was imperative she made it to the hub. Nothing else really mattered in light of that. Not even Chakotay.

And maybe this time Seven could restrain herself from pleading ignorance. That Borg bitch had known all along about the hub. But why would she want to go to Earth when she had everything she wanted right there on Voyager?

Calm down, Kathryn, she told herself. It will all be okay soon.

She sighed. Maybe she should just go back to New Earth and tell Tuvok to take his cure and shove it where the sun don't shine.

She grinned. Tom really had been a bad influence on her.

* * *

"Computer, pull up Voyager's navigational logs." She stared at the screen as the information appeared. "Good. Now extrapolate Voyager's position on this stardate…" she tapped the keys, and the schematic changed to show the area of space they had been in when they found Friendship One. "Set heading to these spatial and temporal coordinates." She took a deep breath. "Well, here we go. Computer, activate chrono deflector. Deploy armor. Activate tachyon pulse and direct it at the programmed heading." She closed her eyes. "I can't believe I'm doing this," she mumbled. "Blatantly violating the temporal prime directive…well, no turning back now." She opened her eyes and silently said good-bye to her life here. "Computer, engage." 

She had to close her eyes again against the intensity of the light that came from the rapidly generating rift. She was pushed back into her seat as the shuttle's velocity picked up, and then she was inside the rift.

The first thing she saw when she opened her eyes was Voyager.

Tears streamed down her face, but she wiped them off when she saw she was being hailed. "Open a channel," she said roughly.

And there she was.

God, had she ever really been that young?

Her younger self started in surprise, and Kathryn could see the other bridge officers looking at each other in shock. So, she hadn't gotten so old that they couldn't recognize her, then. Well, that was a relief.

"Well, aren't you going to invite me onboard?"

Captain Janeway's mouth opened and closed a few times before she could get any actual words out. "It's usually considered polite to introduce yourself, Admiral."

Kathryn chuckled without mirth. "So, you noticed I outrank you. Nothing gets past you, does it, Kathryn?" then she noticed Seven standing at her console. She scowled. "Well, almost nothing."

Now everyone really looked confused. And Janeway really looked pissed. "I don't know what you're talking about…Admiral, but I'd like you to tell me what the hell is going on."

Ahh, there was that spark she missed about herself, that little Irish temper that had always served her well during her captaincy. What a bitch.

She smirked at her counterpart. "I've come to bring Voyager home."

Silence.

Janeway's mouth had dropped open, and she seemed to be having a hard time putting it back in place. "Wh-why?" she finally managed to stutter out. "Why would you commit such a gross violation of the temporal prime directive? Do you want to get us both court marshaled?"

Kathryn sighed. "Captain, maybe you should beam me aboard. We have a lot to talk about."

_TBC_

* * *

Soooooo...what do we think? Shall I continue? Any suggestions? 


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own Voyager or the Twilight Zone. Enjoy!

* * *

She materialized on the transporter pad.

She gazed around the room. It was exactly the way she remembered it. It didn't belong to her anymore, but it was a comfort to know that it belonged to some form of her.

Tuvok and Chakotay were there, standing strong and proud, young and healthy. She nearly stumbled when she first saw them, so surprised as she was that they were there.

Captain Janeway stood in front of the transporter pad, silently appraising her. There was that stubborn, skeptical look Kathryn had once seen in the mirror on a daily basis. _Well, it won't be much longer before she has a far different look on her face,_ Kathryn thought sadly.

Janeway stood up straighter. "Welcome aboard," she said, almost grudgingly.

Kathryn smiled and looked around. "It's good to be back."

* * *

The good captain took her to the ready room, with an armed escort, of course. She dismissed the escort once they reached the doors. Chakotay and Tuvok both made sounds of protest, but she waved them off. "I hardly think she came back in time just to kill herself, Chakotay."

Chakotay gave Kathryn one last suspicious look – which made her want to roar with laughter, considering where his suspicions weren't and should be at the moment – before motioning to Tuvok and the guards to desist. The ready room doors closed, and Janeway made her way to the replicator.

Kathryn followed her, and she took the cup Janeway had just replicated, inhaling the fragrant aroma of her once iron clad vice. "Fresh coffee," she sighed.

Her counterpart smiled in amusement. "Would you like a cup?"

"No, I gave it up years ago. I only drink tea now."

A look of horror passed over Janeway's face. "I beg your pardon?"

Kathryn shook her head in remorse. "Doctor's firm, strict orders. It took months to wean me off of it. He and Chakotay would catch me…so many times…" she trailed off wistfully, still staring at the cup in her hand. "It was a lot of things. Waking up gasping for breath, racing heart…the Doctor fixed it, but he told me that continuing with my caffeine intake the way I was, it was only going to put me in an early grave." She shrugged and handed back the cup. "I only drink de-caffeinated tea now," she said wryly. "You get used to it."

"Coffee…coffee?" Janeway asked, still with a look of horror on her face. "Of all the things I've had to give up out here, I never thought coffee would be one of them."

Kathryn turned around and walked to the upper level, settling herself on to one of the couches. _I forgot how comfortable these were,_ she thought. "What else have you given up, Kathryn?"

Janeway looked at her sharply. "What do you mean?"

Kathryn smiled coolly. "I know exactly what you're thinking right now."

Janeway raised an eyebrow. "Oh, you've become a telepath?"

"I used to be you, remember?" she said bitterly. "I know every stupid thought that runs through that head of yours. And I know every thought that _will_ run through your head, and believe me Kathryn, after enough years out here, they don't become very pretty."

"Is that so?"

"After what you're about to go through…you're lucky, I've come in time to save you from a handful of very, very fatal mistakes. The first thing I've come to do is save Joe Carey. He's going to be killed-"

"Joe?" Janeway's face paled and she moved closer to where her counterpart sat. "Joe's already dead. He died about a month ago."

Kathryn's skin took on the same pallor as Janeway's. "What?" she gasped. "But that's impossible! I programmed the temporal deflector for that precise stardate!" She stood up and placed her shaking hands on the guardrail. Her teeth clenched, she slapped a hand against the metal rail, shaking her head. "I made sure I would be here in time to save him! What if I'm too late…" she looked at Janeway, her blue eyes piercing and frightening. "What's the stardate?"

"54972.2…why?" Janeway narrowed her eyes.

Kathryn shook her head. "Damn," she whispered.

"Why? What is it?" Then, seeming to get a hold of herself, Janeway lifted her hands as if to ward off the older woman's words. "You know what? I shouldn't be listening to details about the future."

"Oh, the almighty Temporal Prime Directive!" She glared at her younger self. "Yes, because following either Prime Directive has certainly paid off for you, hasn't it, Captain? Following Starfleet's directives and general orders and protocol and God forsaken commandments have really, _really_ improved your quality of life, haven't they?"

"By keeping structure on this ship and following Starfleet protocol we've survived out here a lot longer than anyone expected us to!" Janeway snapped at her. "We've made sure we haven't lost who we are, unlike Ransom and his crew. I'm sure you remember _them_."

"Haven't lost who you are? _Who are you?_ You're not Kathryn Janeway anymore, and you know it. You're Captain Janeway. There's very little of Kathryn left."

"Sacrificing a part of myself for my crew-"

"A part they never asked or expected you to sacrifice."

"This is all a dim memory to you, but it is my _life_, Admiral. How I live it now is my own business."

"Noooooo…" Kathryn said slowly, as thought speaking to a small child. "How you live your life now is _my_ business. Who you are now shapes who I become in my time."

Janeway put a hand to her forehead. "I'm getting a headache," she mumbled.

Kathryn shrugged. "It's that Temporal Prime Directive. Take my advice, it's less of a headache if you just ignore it."

Janeway's head snapped up. "You've obviously decided to," she said, her tone accusatory. "Or you wouldn't be here."

She gazed into her counterpart's eyes, and a part of her was so sad for this woman. Still blinded by Starfleet, still so innocent compared to who she would become. She thought she had seen horror, but she hadn't seen horror like her older self had. She hadn't seen the havoc playing it by the book could wreak. She hadn't seen an empire fall by her own hands. Playing it safe had served no one any good at all.

"A lot's happened to me since I was you."

The good captain stared at her for a moment, surprise and sympathy flickering in her eyes before her captain's mask took over once more.

"Well, I'm still me, and this is still my ship, so no more talk about what's going to happen until I decide otherwise. Understood?"

Kathryn twisted her lips in disgust and made her way from the upper level to stand in front of her counterpart, who really, she thought to herself, was just as stubborn as everyone claimed she had been. "All right. Let's talk about the past. I guess it's…what, three days ago? You detected elevated neutrino emissions in a nebula in grid nine eight six. You thought it might be a way home. You were right. I've come to tell you to take Voyager back to that nebula."

Janeway looked at her with disgust. "It was crawling with Borg. You can't honestly expect me to take my people back in there and hand all of us over to the queen on a silver platter."

"I've brought technology that'll get us past them. Oh, I don't blame you for being skeptical, but if you can't trust yourself, who can you trust?"

"For the sake of argument, let's say I believe everything you're telling me. The future you come from sounds pretty good. Voyager's home, I'm an Admiral, there are ways to defend against the Borg."

Kathryn snorted. "So, why would you want to tamper with such a rosy timeline? To answer that I'd have to tell you more than you want to know, but suffice it to say, if you don't do what I'm suggesting it's going to take you another sixteen years to get this ship home, and there are going to be casualties along the way." She took the other woman's hand, a gesture which made her jump in surprise. "Captain, believe me, the future I come from isn't rosy at all. If you know anything about yourself, you know what it would have taken for me to make this kind of decision. I didn't just decide the hell with the timeline for a good laugh. You have no idea how I struggled with this decision, but the timeline is my responsibility to fix. I thought about each and every life I might be affecting, or erasing. I thought about Sabrina. She's Naomi and Icheb's only child. She's beautiful and precocious and just about the only good that came out of our little trek across this quadrant. I thought about my friend Reg, who just found the love of his life and might not again if I change things. I thought about Miral, who isn't even born yet and who helped me put this all together…by changing the timeline I change the entire course of her life. But Kathryn, then I thought of other things. I thought of Miral again, who grew up without a father, and my friend B'Elanna, who was widowed far too young. I thought about Naomi being abducted by the Fen Domar and being beaten and tortured at sixteen years old…and I thought of all the children we lost during the battle with the Hen'shra're, and the things we did that affected the Federation, even if we didn't know it at the time. Like a stone in a pond, Kathryn, everything we do ripples across the galaxy. I didn't do this on a whim. I didn't do it solely for personal reasons, although believe me, the social existence I live is grim enough for me to do so. I'm alone, Kathryn. Utterly alone, in a way you can't imagine. I feel more isolated than I did when we were in that terrible void, remember?"

Kathryn stared down at their joined hands. "But surely…you have friends…Tuvok, Chakotay…"

"No. No, I don't. I have B'Elanna, and Reg, and they're really my only close confidantes."

She wrinkled her brow. 'Reg? Oh, Reginald Barclay?"

"Yes." Kathryn sighed. "What would it take for you to tamper with the timeline, all on your own? No Captain Braxton's or temporal anomalies, just you?"

Her counterpart contemplated that. "Well…I suppose it would have to be something I did, something which significantly affected a large number of innocent people."

"Like stranding Voyager here?"

She shook her head. "No. No, it took me a long time, but despite the losses we suffered and the setbacks, I've come to terms with that decision. No, it would have to be something on a grand scale. Like if I caused hundreds of thousands of people to die, something like that…" she trailed off at the look on the older woman's lined face. "Is that it?" she gasped. "Is that why you're here?"

"Something like that. Just trust me, Kathryn. I know it's hard, because really, how do you know I am who I say? Well, have your people examine my shuttle. Tell them to take a close look at the weapons systems and the armor technology. In the meantime, the Doctor can confirm my identity. And then, we can get started."

* * *

"Well, my scans of the Admiral's cerebral cortex turned up something interesting," the Doctor pointed the readout of the admiral's brain.  
"What is it?" Janeway asked in confusion, staring at the little blip.

"I'm not sure. I've never seen this kind of implant before."

"Alien technology?"

"The micro-circuitry has a Starfleet signature."  
Kathryn rolled her eyes from the bio-bed. "Of course it does."

They turned around to face her. "Admiral?" The Doctor said cautiously.

"You invented it, twelve years ago from my perspective."

"I'm sorry, Admiral, I didn't realize…"

"What, that I was eavesdropping? I may be old, but my hearing's still excellent thanks to your exemplary care over the years." _Aside from making me give up coffee. Don't think I'll ever forgive you for that._

"So this implant I'm going to invent. What does it do?" The Doctor asked with barely concealed enthusiasm.

"It's a synaptic transceiver. It allows me to pilot a vessel equipped with a neural interface." She hesitated. "And…Well, this part wasn't your idea, it was mine."

"What?" he asked, reminding her of an eager puppy.

"When I decided to come back here, I realized I may run into some…trouble. I knew the temporal time police or whatever they call themselves would realize there was a blip in the timeline, and I didn't want that to happen."

"I wondered," Janeway said. "They always seem to show up, I'm surprised they wouldn't when you plan on completely dumping part of their past."

"I'm really not too concerned with them," she said coldly. "They weren't there when we needed them most. So I devised a method of working with the transceiver to fool them. Well, I didn't actually make it, but I came up with the idea. The transceiver is actually putting out a signal which covers my temporal signature. It blankets the area I'm in, which includes this ship and any surrounding space we're in. It concealed the temporal rift from their prying eyes. So by the time they realize anything is amiss – if they ever even do – my work here will be done."

"Very clever…if not highly illegal," the Doctor said. Then his eyes lit up again. "Tell me, what other extraordinary breakthroughs am I going to make?"

"Doctor!" Janeway chided him.

"Sorry, Captain, but you can't blame a hologram for being curious."

"Just finish your report," she said wearily.

"Yes, ma'am. My scans indicate the two of you are genetically identical. The admiral is you, approximately twenty-six years from now."

Their attention was caught by the swooshing of the Sickbay doors. Kathryn could feel her blood boil as the drone walked in, her icy blonde head held high and her icy blue eyes perusing them all. What she had once seen as confidence, she now realized was the derision with which Seven of Nine regarded them all.

"Hello, Seven," she said coldly, he eyes holding the drone's eyes. _Realize that I know about you. Realize that I'm here to stop you._

Seven hesitated, then nodded to her, clearly puzzled as to why her greatest champion was glaring at her like her greatest enemy. She turned to the captain. "The technology aboard the admiral's ship is impressive. Much of it appears to have been designed to defend against the Borg."

Janeway looked over the PADD Seven had handed her. "Could we install these systems on Voyager?"

"The stealth technology is incompatible, but I believe we can adapt the armor and weapons."

"I knew that would be a problem. Stealth comes standard on all starships and shuttles in my time. But we were never able to properly adapt it to the old systems. I wish there was some way of mimicking it that would work with this ship, but there isn't." Kathryn shrugged. "But believe me, the armor and weapons will be more than enough. You haven't seen firepower until you've seen the trans-phasic torpedoes."

"And we can't penetrate any of the encryptions."

"There's no need for you to know the armor or weapons frequencies," Kathryn said harshly. "Unless you're planning on trying to get through them."

Seven raised an eyebrow at her. "Indeed. Also, the temporal deflector the admiral used to get here…it's burned out. She may be able to jump short distances in space another time or two, but she won't be able to go back to her own timeframe."

Kathryn smirked at the horror stricken look on the captain's face. "I always assumed this was a one way trip." She raised an eyebrow at her younger self. "Well, Captain?"

Her younger self struggled for a moment, clearly ill at ease with making a decision which went against everything she believed in, and even more ill at ease with the possibility of her counterpart being stuck with them for any longer than necessary. Finally, she came to a decision, if a reluctant one.

"Do it."

_"Captain's personal log, stardate 54973.4. We've begun outfitting Voyager with Admiral Janeway's upgrades. As soon as the major modifications are complete we'll reverse course and head back to the nebula. Though I've certainly had some strange experiences in my career, nothing quite compares to the sight of my future self briefing my officers on technology that hasn't been invented yet."_

* * *

Kathryn watched as the admiral pointed something or other out to Tuvok and Chakotay at the tactical station. She saw the way the admiral grinned at her first officer, making absolutely no attempt to be businesslike with him at all. _Is she…_flirting _with him? _She thought in revulsion. _Ugh. She must be twice his age. What is she doing?_

If Kathryn were honest with herself, she would admit that the resented the admiral's presence on her ship. She resented that the woman got along better with a crew that belonged to her, to the _captain_, not the admiral. Admiral Janeway was far more open and almost loving to towards the crew, who, after their initial caution regarding her, had certainly warmed up to her. Hell, they were friendlier to her than they were to her younger counterpart.

_And whose fault is that, Kathryn?_ The insidious voice in her mind, which she tried never to listen to, was there again, making her see the obvious. _You've been pushing the crew away for years. Especially…_ Kathryn winced as her eyes landed on Chakotay again.

_Stop it!_ She ordered the voice. _This isn't about Chakotay at all. He doesn't even have time for me anymore…we hardly see each other. So why would I be wasting time on being jealous of the two of them being all buddy-buddy?_

_Because you pushed him away. Far, far away…and now you realize what a mistake you made. The two of you used to be like the two of them are right now. And…you know he's hiding something. What is he hiding…or who?_

_Stop, _she thought firmly. _What does it matter if it is a who and not a what, or if he's hiding anything at all? It's his life._

She continued to watch them out of the corner of her eye. The old bag placed a hand on Chakotay's, and at first he looked puzzled, but then he turned his hand over and squeezed hers, smiling. She said something to him, and he immediately walked away and towards Kathryn.

"Captain, the admiral is going back to her quarters to rest," he told her, and she her older version disappearing into the turbolift. "She'd like it if we have dinner with her tonight. I mean, I already had plans, but if you're going to agree to it, I would certainly like to."

"Plans?" she asked archly. "Well, I wouldn't want you to inconvenience yourself.

He frowned at the tone in her voice. "Kathryn?"

She sighed. "Never mind. Sure, let's eat dinner in the Twilight Zone."

He nodded, but then stopped. "What?"

"Nothing…too much time around Tom."

* * *

Seven of Nine stomped angrily into the Cargo Bay. All her work, all her plans…three miserable years on this ship, and now some useless hag from the future had to come and screw things up.

She slammed herself into her alcove and waited for the blissful darkness of regeneration. "Computer, begin regeneration cycle."

Only, instead of darkness, she was in a place she certainly didn't feel like being right now.

"Seven of Nine, tertiary adjunct of Unimatrix Zero One. It's been too long."

Seven turned with resignation to face the queen. "What do you want?"

"Do I need a reason to visit a friend?"

"We're not friends."

"No…" the queen glided over and ran a hand down Seven's face. "We're more than that, we're family. And while we're on the subject of old friends, I see that Voyager has just gotten a visitor…and she's come from the future. Tell me why."

Seven, who had just about had it with the queen's incessant demands, felt her hackles rise up. "You may be able to communicate with me while I'm regenerating," she spat out. "But I'm no longer a drone. I don't answer to you."

"Then who do you answer to?"

"Myself."

"Don't be naïve. I could expose you for what you are at any time. You answer to me…Annika."

"Don't call me that," Seven growled.

"Temper, temper." The queen returned to throne, gazing up at Seven. "I know that Voyager is returning to the nebula. I suggest you alter course."

"It isn't my doing. I fed Janeway the information we previously agreed upon. If it weren't for this future version, we would be well on our way."

"So kill her."

"What purpose would that serve? If Captain Janeway's counterpart is killed on a ship full of only Voyager crewmembers, there will be in an uproar. I would be discovered, and my true purpose revealed."

"You're so pessimistic, Seven."

"I am realistic. I've worked too hard for you, my Queen, to have it all tumble down because of an aging had."

The queen smirked. "You've always been my favorite, Seven. In spite of their obvious imperfections, I've left the crew of Voyager alone. Maybe I don't agree that they were the best choice for this mission, but I can see that they were the obvious choice."

"That is a contradiction."

The Queen ignored her and instead examined her hand. "You've done good work there, Seven. You've earned the trust of the crew, especially of the captain. You've been able to examine sensitive areas of Voyager, and you've learned more about the Federation than we learned in all our previous assimilations. Allowing you to remain disconnected from the hive mind was a good decision." She glanced at Seven. "How would you feel if I were to assimilate them all now?"

"I would be irritated. We are near our goal."

"It is a long term goal. We have no way of knowing how long it will take them to get back to the Federation. I tire of waiting."

"So why don't you just assimilate them on your own?" Seven asked impatiently.

"We've tried. We've failed. Dismally. I don't know what it is about these people that we can't overcome. That's why we kept you where you are. You're our…secret weapon, I suppose." The queen let out a long breath. "And we still haven't recovered fully from Species 8472. We have adapted, but we have not recovered our numbers. You must give me any information on any strategies they have."

"They do have new technology from the admiral, and she is convinced it will be enough, but I do not think so. From what I can see, it will be of little protection against the full power of the Borg. I tried to decrypt the frequencies but so far I have been unable to do so. But Voyager is not a threat to the Collective. By removing them, you destroy all our plans."

The Queen nodded slowly. "Perhaps you're right," she eyed her protégé. "How is the good commander?"

A sly smiled spread across Seven's face. "Complying."

"A pity Captain Janeway can't be turned toward the female persuasion, but her first officer will do just as well. With the top officers of Voyager in your hands, Seven, you'll be unstoppable."

"That is how we planned it."

"See what you can do to keep them out of the nebula. Although…well, once Captain Janeway sees what she sees, she may run from here as fast as she can."

"Let us hope so. And I will see what I can do to deter the bag. She interfered too much already. I had planned to inject the commander with the nano-probes tonight, but she commandeered him and the captain for dinner."

"Take care of her, Seven."

"I will."

"You will make a good queen one day, Seven, should the need ever arise." The Queen stood up and ran her hand down Seven's face again. "A fine Queen. Are you ready?"

"I am."

"It will hurt."

Seven gazed into her eyes. "I take the pain willingly, my Queen. They will realize that resistance is futile."

"Good little drone," the queen murmured.

* * *

The dinner was going smoothly, if not a trifle awkward. Captain Janeway was brooding quietly, so Chakotay made the effort to entertain the admiral. She was a charming woman, with so many of the qualities he admired in Kathryn, several of which he hadn't seen in quite some time. It was surreal to see who Kathryn was going to be, and at the same time, disappointing. Because as charming as the admiral was, she had clearly not aged well, and there was certainly a look of bitterness and sadness in her eyes. The future, evidently, was not going to be kind.

"So tell me, Admiral," he asked her as they were starting desert, while Kathryn nursed a cup of black coffee with more vigor than usual. "How many children were born here?"

The admiral paused in the act of lifting her tea cup to her lips. A strange look passed over her face, but then she smiled. 'There are ten in my time. Miral, of course."

"Miral?'

"Tom and B'Elanna's daughter," Kathryn said suddenly. "Didn't you know that?"

He was slightly embarrassed. "I hadn't realized they picked a name."

"Where have you _been_ lately, anyway? I normally have to learn these tidbits through you."

"I told you about the false alarm. And the betting pool!"

"And that's about all you've told me in weeks. I don't even know-"

"Children," the admiral said. 'Let's not fight. I'm sure Chakotay has been busy…life, and all that."

He looked to her in thanks but stopped cold. The look she was giving him was one he'd never seen on Kathryn's face. It was disappointment, anger, sadness…loss.

Before he could comment on it, it faded away and she smiled again. "Miral, Naomi, but I don't really count her as the ten. There's Kassie, Taylor, Jason, Sabrina, T'Lee, Forlan, Quor, Bianca, Michael and…Spark."

"Spark?"

"Don't ask." She shook her head. "And of course, there's Valerie."

Chakotay smiled at the mention of Valerie. No one had thought the little Borg baby they had found with Icheb and the other children would survive, and it had taken a long time for her to recover, but she was a real trooper. Crewman Christina Jenkins had adopted her, after petitioning the captain. Kathryn had been reluctant, because she was concerned that being a single mother might be too much of a burden to take on, but Chakotay had pointed out that Samantha Wildman seemed to have no trouble. In fact, so many other crewmembers took time with Naomi that she was hardly ever seen with her mother as it was, a practice Samantha was getting tired of, from what he heard. So Kathryn had signed off on the adoption, and Christina and Valerie, who was about two now, were doing quite well. The little girl was still struggling with her development, and she wasn't seen around the ship all that often, but according to the Doctor, she was improving in leaps and bounds.

"Valerie will grow up all right, then?"

"Absolutely. Within a year from now she'll be like any other child, running all over the ship and making trouble." The admiral grinned.

Kathryn, sitting in her own world, mentally glaring at the admiral, silently wondered about the children her counterpart had claimed died on Voyager.

"So…okay, I have to ask." He shot a sidelong glance at Kathryn, knowing this question might upset her. "Are any of those children mine?"

There was that look again, that same look she'd given him when Kathryn had been interrogating him. She opened her mouth, but before she could answer, Kathryn's commbadge went off. _"Captain Janeway, please report to sickbay for a medical emergency."_

_TBC_

* * *

Anyone who has any suggestions, anything they'd like to see in this, please let me know. I know most of us were highly disappointed by the Endgame farce, so if there's anything you hoped had happened please let me know and I'll see if I can fit it in! 


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